Gaz
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USE OF DRIVE-THRU CASH POINT MACHINESAn old one, but still very funny.  
With the arrival of the new "drive-thru" cash point machines customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. The following recommended procedures have been drawn up.
MALE PROCEDURES
• Dive up to the cash machine.
• Lower the car window.
• Insert card into the machine and enter PIN.
• Enter amount of cash required.
• Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
• Raise window.
• Drive off.
FEMALE PROCEDURES
• Drive up to the cash machine.
• Reverse back to align the car window to the machine.
• Restart the stalled engine.
• Lower the window.
• Find handbag, empty contents onto the passenger seat and locate card.
• Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear-view mirror.
• Replace contents of the handbag.
• Attempt to insert card into machine.
• Open car door to reach machine due to the excessive distance from the car.
• Insert card.
• Re-insert card the right way up.
• Re-enter handbag to locate diary with PIN on inside of back page.
• Enter PIN.
• Press cancel and re-enter the correct PIN.
• Enter the amount of cash required.
• Re-check make-up in rear-view mirror.
• Retrieve cash and receipt.
• Empty handbag again, locate purse, place cash and receipt inside.
• Drive forwards two metres.
• Reverse back to cash machine.
• Retrieve card.
• Re-empty handbag, locate cardholder, place card in the slot provided.
• Re-check make-up in the rear-view mirror before attempting to move off again.
• Restart stalled engine and pull away.
• Drive for three to four miles.
• Release handbrake.
 
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Spenny
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do they really drive cars on our roads
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Jim Hebbs
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You missed some in the female procedures Gaz, they usually ask for a balance slip, then they check the balance on that one, then take that card out, search on the passenger seat for another card, then put that one in, ask for a balance slip on that one, check the balance on that one, compare the two balance slips and then re-enter the card with the most balance on it before withdrawing cash!!
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Andrew
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It's like checkout behaviour - it always comes as a shock when they have to pay, a surprise every time. They get asked for the money - then they start the hunt for the purse etc... any clubcard vouchers? meanwhile I've got my cash in my hand while I'm queueing up!
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sandie seward
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Card procedures do take far more time up than actually paying cash, particularly at supermarkets.
Sorry Gary, but as a female driver, I don't find your post particularly amusing!!!! 
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Gaz
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.gif) Sorry Sandie. .gif)
Do you forgive me? 
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Spenny
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that might be a no
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vincent ryder
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| Andrew wrote: | | It's like checkout behaviour - it always comes as a shock when they have to pay, a surprise every time. They get asked for the money - then they start the hunt for the purse etc... any clubcard vouchers? meanwhile I've got my cash in my hand while I'm queueing up! |
Very true and I swear that there is a "Social Checkout" lane at my local supermarket and I often seem to unwittingly get in it. I live in a small town where everyone knows everyone. The checkout clerk must have seen every new baby photo that was ever taken The person in front of me always seems to have a new grandchild. So in addition to fumbling for change there's also the "picture show" delay.
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Jim Hebbs
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Just this afternoon I was in my local supermarket, I only bought two small items, I was behind two women in their twenties, they were chatting away all through the checkout, then their items go through, oops, time to pay, £27.32p, rummage through their handbags to find their credit cards, after seven minutes they found one, didn't work, find another one, that one worked, then they decided they wanted cashback but couldn't decide how much, finally settled on £10.00. Total time to pay, eleven minutes!! Now why couldn't they have sorted out their cards and how much cashback they wanted while they were waiting in the line, instead of chatting away and waiting till they got to the till???
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Corgi kid
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| Gaz wrote: | Sorry Sandie.
Do you forgive me? |
Never mind Gaz, You can't win them all.
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sandie seward
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" I suppose so" (said in a low voice rather grudgingly). 
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Gaz
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 Great, were friends again!
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Corgi kid
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| sandie seward wrote: | | " I suppose so" (said in a low voice rather grudgingly). |
Oh my god, Violet all over......
Thats here reaction when I ask If I can go to the Toyfair..
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sandie seward
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You wouldn't get that reaction from me Corgi if you wanted to go to a toyfair, I'd just expect to come with you (me driving, naturally), and then go off and do my own thing (rummaging under the tables in the bargain bins), whilst you enjoyed the rest of the stalls and met your mates.
Gary? Of course we're still friends.
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